Letting it Happen

The hay is in the barn.

That's a comment a fellow Dailymiler made on one of my workouts this week. There's nothing more I can physically do now before race day. So instead focusing on trying to calm my mind.

Normally I'm not very good at this type of thing. I'm kind of go-go-go and don't take a lot of time to do things like meditate or focus my mind inward in any way. There's just too many distractions everywhere and let's face it all those kitten videos on the internet aren't going to watch themselves. I realize though how much of marathoning is a mental game though. When I look back at my implosion at Wisconsin Marathon during the final 10K I wonder how much of it was in my head. Sure, I definitely felt my hip locking up after mile 20, but part of me wonders if my brain took that unanticipated obstacle as an excuse to bail out.

Or maybe I just wasn't ready that day. I really doesn't matter I suppose. But I'll be damned if I start to check out mentally this time.

I've felt some negativity penetrate my "bubble" this week. I don't want to dwell on these thoughts because I can't think of any way they are constructive or helpful. I'm simply going to acknowledge my feelings and then let them go.

In an attempt to foster positivity I decided to make a good luck charm. For months there's been a locket that used to belong to one of the kids floating around the junk drawer in our kitchen.  I decided to snag it yesterday and put photos inside of two people who I'm pretty sure would still be pretty proud of me even if I end up falling flat on my face on Sunday. On the right is my mom, who never got a chance to know me as a runner. She knew me as a dancer and came to every single performance of mine, even if I was only on stage for a couple of minutes. I know she would be my biggest cheerleader of all if she was still here. The second photo is my grandpa who just passed away last Christmas. Since he lived in Florida for the last 25 years or so he also never saw me run. But whenever we spoke on the phone he would ask me how many miles my next marathon was going to be.  Some people think that question is exasperating but I found it incredibly endearing and I miss hearing it.



So that's it. I've been blogging a lot this week and it's been cathartic for me. Maybe it's self indulgent? Yeah, it probably is. But it's making me feel better.

Nothing left to do now but let it happen.

Pins and Needly

One. More. Week. 

Not to be overly dramatic but it's seriously difficult for me to think about anything else right now. I'm trying really hard not to be a broken record on social media about the marathon- which really just means that I lurk and don't post anything at all because IT'S ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT. I'm pretty much insufferable, and going into the final week of taper I'm probably only going to get worse. All of this is familiar territory but this time around I feel like I have so much more riding on this race. (It is not lost on me that these expectations have been created by myself, but they exist nonetheless.) So here I sit scouring the internet for BQ race reports, constructing pace spreadsheets and of course, weather stalking. (Current forecast: 44 degrees at the start, no rain, winds 8mph! Wheeee!)

Meanwhile, I finished another "last" workout- my final double digit run of this training cycle. During the final cooldown mile it dawned on me that there is really nothing left for me to do. All the hard work has already been done and all I have to do is now is rest and wait for the actual day. I thought about this and suddenly I felt like I didn't want that last workout to end. So at 11 1/2 miles into my 12 mile run I stopped and walked the rest of the way home. I guess I just wanted to let everything sink in. Not just the past 14 weeks of this training cycle- but the whole 9 months since I first decided I was going to try for this outrageous goal. It's all coming together now. It's coming together and I'm ready! I'm so ready. Let's go.

Weekend Shenanigans and Taper Madness

Well the first week of taper for Lakefront Marathon is in the books. I woke up sick on Monday morning and felt like crap for most of the week. Bluh. I kept telling myself that it was better to be sick now that in 2 weeks. Get it out of the way now, right? Still, it put a wrench in my plans to race the Brewers 10K all out on Saturday. The sicks combined with a hilly course made for a not-so-fun morning for me.  Oh well. I wish I could have had a good race experience ahead of the marathon but I suppose it's more important that my overall training has been on point. Now is the time to trust the process.

Brewers 10K. Don't let my smile fool you.

SUNDAY however was a completely different day. With the help of my friends Deb and Sheila, we organized a "virtual" edition of the Beat the Blerch race, an event happening out in Oregon on the same day that sadly we were unable to attend. Everyone brought snack-y junk food to Sheridan Park and ran/blerched either a 5K, 10K or half marathon. Fun ensued and good times were a-plenty! It was the perfect way to come off of a hard race and just enjoy some easy running with friends. Also snacks. 

The smiles are real this time.

So now we enter week 2 of taper.  Let's keep this train rolling. 

Taper Celebration!